6 Distinct Signs You Are in a Toxic Relationship
Relationships are a cornerstone of our lives, but not all of them are positive. When a relationship becomes toxic, it can take a toll on your well-being and happiness. Recognizing the signs of a toxic relationship is the first step toward healing and building healthier connections.
1. No calls or texts when you’re not around.
If your partner doesn’t call or text when you’re not around, they might only think about you when you’re there. Even when apart, the emotional connection should stay strong. In a healthy relationship, time apart is fine as long as both people stay in touch.
If your partner goes silent for long periods, it could be a sign of emotional distancing. This is common for people with certain attachment styles who might ghost to avoid rejection, or for narcissists who struggle to maintain consistent emotional connections because they see people in extremes.
2. Intense jealousy starts to dictate your actions.
Missing someone is normal, but acting out with passive-aggressive jealousy when they go about their life is not. If your partner becomes jealous over routine activities, or if you feel irrationally jealous when they do things on their own, it could indicate a toxic dynamic in the relationship.
3. You start spending less time with your friends.
If you feel like you’re losing yourself and distancing from your friends, it’s a sign that your relationship might be toxic. You might feel lonely even with your partner. Being together 24/7 blurs boundaries and leads to emotional instability.
Toxic partners often use guilt and manipulation to keep you close, causing you to pull away from others, which leads to loneliness and depression. Toxic relationships don’t usually start that way, they develop over time and often lead to the loss of friends and estrangement from family.
4. It feels like you’ve lost who you are.
Toxic people often control and manipulate others to fit their own needs. They make their interests the focus of the relationship, and you might find yourself doing things you don’t want to do, going against your values, or being around people who make you anxious — all just to please them.
It can be hard to see this by yourself. Let trusted friends or family point it out when they notice you losing yourself in someone else’s life. Sometimes they can see things you might miss.
5. Your partner rarely looks you in the eyes.
If your partner avoids eye contact, it could be a sign of deeper issues in your relationship like hidden anger or anxiety. They might feel bored, disagree with you, or not be interested in what you’re saying. It’s like saying, “You’re not important.” If your partner used to make eye contact and suddenly stops, it’s a red flag.
According to an expert, eye contact is incredibly intimate. It shows trust, and emotional openness, and tells the partner “I’m yours.” A sudden lack of eye contact could indicate a festering problem in your relationship that needs attention.
6. Frequently bearing the blame.
In toxic relationships, one partner often ends up being blamed for everything, no matter the situation. This constant blame can warp your sense of self, making you feel responsible for things that are out of your control. Living in a state of guilt or submission can leave you unable to stand up for your own needs or rights.
Some relationships can be improved and are truly worth saving. With effort, they can grow stronger. But sometimes, it takes courage and strength to end relationships that don’t make you feel good. In those cases, it’s important to let go and not ever reunite with that person, even if it’s hard.