I Confessed to My Wife About Cheating and Her Response Was Devastating

36-year-old Sean wrote to us. His letter is full of despair and emotion. The fact is that he destroyed his family’s happiness when he cheated on his wife. Over time, she seemed to forgive him, but the reality was much worse.

Sean had a short-term affair and confessed about his infidelity to his wife.

Sean, 36, has recently sent a letter to our editorial and told us about his very complicated family situation. The man expected that he would be judged by many people, but he still wants to get some opinions and some pieces of advice from people, who won’t remain indifferent to his problem.

The man opened his letter, saying, “My wife Rosa and I have been happily married for 15 years now. We’ve been through many life situations together, and we’ve always found the way out together. We’ve been more than spouses all this time, we’ve been kindred spirits and our marriage has been based upon trust and mutual understanding. We never lied to each other and never cheated. But recently, things took an opposite turn and our family is now falling apart with a speed of light.”

Sean explained, “I know I did something really awful and disgusting, I cheated on my wife with a client of mine. I don’t really know why I did all this, my body felt like it was on autopilot, and after a short time I couldn’t take the guilt anymore. I immediately cut off my affair partner. I ended my relationship with her as a client, too, and passed her contract to a coworker. I have had no contact with her ever since. I also confessed about this to my wife, and I’ve been doing individual therapy since then, too.”

Sean expected a very emotional reaction from his wife and was partly prepared for it.

Sean confessed, “At first, my wife got really upset and depressed, she was absolutely angry. I was seriously worried about her mental state. I did expect some big drama, but I’ve never seen her so depressed before. I begged her not to divorce me.

I proposed some counseling, therapy, and even allowing her to have relationships with other men, but she wasn’t interested. She just asked me to leave her alone and give her more time to cope with the pain on her own. She insisted that I must move out and wait until she calls me with her suggestions about our future life together.”

The man didn’t object against his wife’s will. Sean wrote, “I picked my things and left to live at my parents’. I called her every day, and she sounded broken and frustrated, I could hear it in her voice that she was totally hurt, and I could understand this. She refused any help from me and only kept telling me that she needed more space, which I allowed her to have.”

One day, the behavior of Sean’s wife totally changed.

Sean wrote, “3 weeks after I confessed to her about my infidelity, my wife suddenly started behaving in a very strange way. She called me and asked me to take my things and move back into our house, which I happily did. She said she wanted to try to work us out, and she instantly jumped in, being the best wife a man can ask for.”

Sean revealed, “She cooked my favorite dishes, left me loving notes, and bought herself new clothes to look even more attractive to me. Her reactions were lukewarm at best. She smiled and thanked me, and she kept telling me how she loved me more than anything. She barely initiated a talk about what had happened between us, and I didn’t bring it up either. I was shocked about this change, but I thought she was just a strong and reasonable woman, and I believed that she decided not to let a short-term affair spoil our marriage.”

The man wrote, “I didn’t find my wife’s behavior suspicious at all, but there was one thing that I couldn’t understand, and she would never explain it to me. I found out that she started visiting a doctor, a gynecologist, and she did it too often, like, it wasn’t a regular checkup or something. I mean, she had appointments with the doctor almost every week, and these visits started shortly after I confessed to her about cheating.”

Sean was worried about his wife’s health and he confronted her about her frequent appointments with a doctor.

Sean wrote, “I was thinking of some serious health problems that my wife might have had, and these visits didn’t let me sleep peacefully at night. She did have some issues with her reproductive system, and this is why we didn’t have any kids. Or so I thought.”

The man revealed, “When I finally confronted my wife about her health and her visits to the gynecologist, she smiled and then announced to me that she didn’t have any health problems at all. She said that she was visiting the doctor because she consulted about her pregnancy. I was dumbfounded, then I felt so happy that we would have a baby.

But then my spouse dropped a bombshell on me. She confessed that this baby wasn’t mine. She said she had been having an affair with another man, just like I did with another woman, and that she fell pregnant from him. I could feel how all my life was turning upside down at that moment.”

Sean wrote, “My wife said that everything that happened in our family was fair, and she believed that each of us got what we deserved. She suggested staying together, and she said I could adopt the baby if I had a wish to do so, explaining that she had no longer been in touch with the baby’s bio dad and saying that this man wouldn’t have been happy if he had found out she was pregnant.”

The man is totally broken, and he has a lot of feelings about the situation. He wrote, “I have a gut feeling that the baby is mine and that my wife had never been unfaithful to me. I believe what she was saying was revenge, she wanted me to feel the pain that she was feeling after my painful confession to her. But at the same time, what if she wasn’t lying and the baby isn’t mine? What should I do in this situation? I’m torn.”

It’s a really confusing situation and we wanted to know what our readers think.

• So you wanted her to forgive YOUR affair, but now you don’t know what to do. Give me a break. Leave, she’s better off without you. © Erin Brennan / Facebook
• Just get a paternity test. And it appears you weren’t that happy if you cheated. Happy men don’t cheat. Men who have all their needs met don’t cheat. And because you didn’t address the problems with your wife, it all bubbled up inside until one day it burst. © Adrian Alexe / Facebook
• If you can do it, she can too, I don’t see a problem here. Go see if your affair partner is not pregnant with your child. © Rozan Siraki / Facebook
• So paying hurt with hurt? What kind of marriage is that. And in the end, a child probably grows up fatherless. Two egoistical people at play. © Becxy Schenk / Facebook
• Wow, well, if he feels that way, he should do a paternity test when the baby is born. And what? Now “he’s” broken?? Isn’t it funny what happens after someone breaks their vows and is practising infidelity? Then they confess to alleviate the guilt in themselves and pass on the hurt and shame to the person they did it to. Confessing only makes themselves feel better. © Cassandra Stevenson / Facebook
• You confessed because YOU couldn’t stand the guilt. If you REALLY loved your wife, you would have kept your mouth shut to spare her the pain. © Mary Haritos / Facebook
• Both you grown-ups need to put your own feelings aside n think of that poor unborn child — who is the real Dad, get that sorted first n foremost so that poor baby won’t have to grow up between your lies n uncertainty. © Hiria Moanaroa / Facebook

Here’s the story of another betrayal. A wife prepared a cold revenge for her unfaithful husband.