My Best Friend Unexpectedly Proposed to Me, and Now I Plan to Move

Being best friends with someone of the opposite gender can be great, but it’s not always simple. One young woman is currently facing a challenging situation: her male best friend has proposed to her, expecting her to be thrilled, but she’s feeling anything but happy about it.

Our reader shared her story with us.

What people said.

• Wow, this is the biggest misread I’ve ever heard of. I don’t think your friendship recover from this (at least for now). The best you can do is make it clear that you don’t feel the same way at all. © Bognutsman / Reddit
• Let’s be clear about this, he has killed the friendship, not you. © Arseface101 / Reddit
• If/when he returns, I would only meet to discuss this in a public area. It doesn’t sound like he’s taking it well, and his perception of reality seems to be questionable. © fivenightrental / Reddit
• Do you know his family. Maybe call his mum or whatever to see if he’s been acting different lately. © Remarkable_Toe_4423 / Reddit
• Reach out to his family and share your concerns. Normal, healthy-minded people do not imagine years-long romantic relationships with people. I would also avoid being alone with him until it’s confirmed that his grasp on reality is not tenuous. © stillcantsee / Reddit

Our advices.

• Tell him the truth. You have to talk to Mason one way or another, you can’t hide for the rest of your life. It might feel awkward or even scary, but it’s important to be real with him. He’s grown up enough to understand and accept your decision. Make sure to be respectful and kind, let him know you care about your friendship, but you don’t want to advance the relationship.
• Prepare for any reaction. Mason might have different reactions, but you should be ready for anything. Don’t say yes until you actually want it. It seems like it was easy to pressure you to say yes, bearing in mind the circumstances, so beware. Only you know what kind of man Mason is, so you should know how he usually reacts to upsetting things.
• Be ready to lose a friend. Most likely, Mason won’t want to stay friends since he already opened up to you. It might be hard for him to see how you interact with other men. Eventually, if you end up finding a new boyfriend, he might feel like he doesn’t fit into your life anymore, so he’ll just have to leave.

Friendships can encounter tough times, but honesty and complete acceptance can help navigate through them. Despite the challenges, the effort is worthwhile.