Losing My Fiancé Wasn’t Hard Enough — Now My Sister Wants the Ring He Left Me

Family dynamics may only grow tenser once brought together in marriage. Recently, a Reddit user shared her story, finding herself at the center of a major family conflict after being asked to part with her wedding ring given to her by her late fiancé. In the face of grief, should a family heirloom outweigh the ring’s newfound sentimental value?

A boundary crossed, and family loyalties tested.

So this has turned into a huge fight in my family, and I don’t know if I’m in the wrong or not. I lost my fiancé, Dorian, three years ago in a car accident. It was horrible, and I’m still healing from it. One of the few things I have left of him is my engagement ring. I don’t wear it anymore, but I keep it in a box on my dresser because it means the world to me.

Last week, my younger sister, Elara, got engaged and we were all so happy for her. But then she pulled me aside and asked me for a favor. She said since I’m not using Dorian’s ring anymore, I should give it to her so she can use the diamond for her own ring. I just stared at her and asked if she was serious. She said yes because it would be a beautiful way to honor Dorian and also be practical since diamonds are expensive.

A family divided by lack of empathy.

I told her absolutely not. The ring is one of the last things I have of Dorian, and I’m not giving it away. She got upset and said I was being selfish. Since I’m dating someone new now, I should be moving on and letting go of the past. I told her that moving on does not mean erasing Dorian from my life.

Then she started crying, which got my mom involved. My mom immediately took her side, saying that holding onto the ring is only keeping me stuck in grief and that giving it to Elara would help me move forward and be symbolic. I told them both to drop it, but Elara keeps texting me, saying she deserves a family heirloom just like our cousins got and that I’m being cruel for keeping it to myself.

My boyfriend, Cassian, is totally on my side and thinks Elara is being ridiculous, but half my family is acting like I’m the bad guy. So?

The internet took her side.

• Hide your ring, often when family won’t take no for an answer, or pressure you to agree, they resort to taking the item even without consent. © Ill-Novel5199 / Reddit
• I would tell them to stop immediately, it’s disrespectful, and that I’m blocking them for a week to think about it. If they mention it again, I’m blocking them a month and not going to the wedding. © Far_Information_9613 / Reddit
• She sees your ring as a family heirloom just because your fiancé died? Isn’t that disturbing? She has 0 right to the ring. © BliepBlipBlop / Reddit

• Ask your mum to give your sister her own engagement ring, see how she reacts then. © jclom0 / Reddit
• It is your ring. Something you have to remember your lover that was taken from you way too soon. Furthermore. It is NOT a family heirloom. Point blank, all there is to it. If she wants a family heirloom, she needs to be asking your mother for her engagement ring, a grandmothers if they’re alive. Her fiancé’s mother or grandmothers.
  Just because you do not use it every day does not mean that anyone else has a right to it. Stick up for yourself. Do not let them talk you out of that ring, you will likely regret it forever. And if you do decide to ever give it away, it should be because YOU want to. Whether it’s you selling it, giving it to a future child. It’s your property and your decision. They can kick rocks, and if your mother wants to stick her nose in it, kindly thank her for offering up her own jewelry to picked through to be repurposed for your sister’s engagement ring. © InternationalAbies72 / Reddit
• It is yours to keep or give away. Also, I find it insulting for your sister’s bf that she is not happy with the ring he gave her. If I were him, I would rethink the relationship. © Equal_Factor_6449 / Reddit

For many people, their wedding day represents the ultimate celebration of happiness, creating precious memories they’ll treasure forever. Read this story about a wedding that should have been the most beautiful day, but turned into a devastating experience of betrayal and heartbreak.