“I Regret Having My Daughter”, A New Mom Revealed Her Feelings

Relationships
9 months ago

Parenting can be tougher than expected. A young mom with a 10-month-old baby shared on social media that, despite having a cute and independent baby, she feels regretful. This sparked a lot of responses from others.

A desperate woman took to social media to pour her heart out.

Talking to a popular forum for parents, a woman who’s also a new mom shared her thoughts of early motherhood. The woman said her child was 10 months old and she started feeling a deep regret.

She wrote, “I love her more than anything in the world. I constantly worry about something bad happening to her. She is a lovely, bright, happy, sweet, and quite independent child. But I just can’t shake the feeling that I regret having her.” The woman then added that she missed her old life before giving birth, especially when she had time for herself and watching Netflix.

The woman explained that she just wanted to return to old good times. She wrote that she had a quiet, peaceful, unexciting life, and that’s what she actually liked the most. Speaking about herself, she pointed out that she’s a very introverted, self-contained person, and she had always been happy just being by herself, working from home, watching Netflix in the evenings, enjoying nature and having dinner out now and again. Holiday once in a while was also an option for her at that time.

The woman realized that she just doesn’t like parenting. Her old lifestyle was totally gone with the birth of her baby and now her life became full of constant sense of responsibility, constantly having to entertain a baby, never being able to just sit and relax and do nothing all day, always having to be on alert. The mum said she hoped things would get better for her as her child would grow up a little.

People were quick to deliver their opinions on mom’s cry for help.

The users, who read the post, couldn’t hold back their emotions. Opinions were very contradictory, with many of them supporting the young lady. One user wrote, “It will get better, ignore anyone who relishes in telling you otherwise, babies are awful. It gets much easier when you can communicate with them two-way. It won’t be like this forever, I promise.”

Another person said, “I don’t think it’s so much the baby as the grieving for your old life. I felt all those things you do, and I was an older mum who liked my lazy ways. When I had my second, my baby was just as tricky on paper, but I was no longer grieving my old life, so it’s way easier.”

Someone else added, “I found the baby age mind-numbing because you are constantly on alert but never really doing anything you want to. Once you don’t have to watch every single thing they do, and they actually want to do quite fun things with you, it definitely gets better. Don’t get me wrong, long brunches are a thing of the past, but you get much more of yourself back once they get to school age.”

How do specialists advise on coping with baby blues.

Of course, the new status of Mom can be tough to accept and to live in it. These period can may be accompanied by baby blues. Postpartum or baby blues refer to the experience of sadness that can arise after giving birth. These emotions may manifest between 2 and 35 days post-delivery and typically persist for up to a two-week period.

Common symptoms are:

  • Experiencing persistent, daily depression.
  • Encountering feelings of shame, guilt, or a sense of failure.
  • Noticing significant mood fluctuations.
  • Diminished interest in activities usually enjoyed.
  • Persistent fatigue and a constant sense of tiredness.
  • Unusual changes in eating habits, either increased or decreased.
  • Sleep disturbances, either difficulty sleeping or excessive sleep.
  • Challenges in concentration and decision-making processes.

The baby blues typically resolve on their own without requiring formal treatment. To enhance the well-being during this period, the following strategies are recommended to be considered:

  • Prioritize getting ample sleep whenever possible.
  • Allocate time for yourself. Enlist the help of someone trustworthy to watch your baby, providing you with opportunities to step out of the house. Exposure to sunlight can also be beneficial.
  • Establish connections with other new parents. Joining a support group with individuals facing similar concerns can be a valuable resource for mutual assistance.
  • Maintain a balanced diet and engage in exercise, if possible. Regular physical activity has the potential to alleviate stress and contribute to overall well-being.

But if these feelings extend beyond the initial two weeks, it’s important to communicate with the healthcare provider.

Being a new mom can be hard, but it’s totally fine to ask for help. It’s not a sign of being weak. Getting support from family and friends makes the tough parts easier, so a mother can enjoy this special time with a baby. We believe asking for help is a strong and smart thing to do.

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I hope you can find a way to cheer up and make it through this. You say that the baby is a lovely, bright, happy, sweet, and quite independent child. That says much for your (high) degree of caring. Now, if you can just stop dwelling on your desire to be in another time and place, things should smooth out. You have to remember that in order for there to be 'good old days' you have to have lived through them. These days, today, in fact, are good old days. What will you make of them? You can laugh and be happy with the baby in your arms as easily as not. Let your friends come close. Share good times with them. You'll be making 'good old days'!
Cheers my friend.
Don't worry, be happy.

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