I Dumped a Guy After He Spent $700 on Our Date — What He Did Next Completely Shocked Me

In today’s dating scene, everyone has a tale to tell. Yet, some stories stand out — not only for their humor but also for the unexpected turns they take. Recently, a young woman from New York shared her experience after meeting what she thought was her perfect match on a well-known dating app. Their pricey first date seemed destined for romance, but things quickly veered off course. What began as a lighthearted dating blunder soon led to a shocking revelation, leaving her questioning whether she’d judged him too harshly.

Our reader, who prefers to stay anonymous, opened up about a memorable experience involving an expensive first date.

“I met this guy on a dating app, and when we matched, he seemed like the perfect guy. He had this effortless confidence and a profile that was actually funny — a rare find on dating apps. He loved adventure, was a dog person, and his playlist could easily rival mine.”

“We started chatting, and somehow, we just clicked. Inside jokes started piling up, and before long, it felt like we’d known each other for years. He even remembered my favorite coffee order and joked he’d have it ready for our first date. So yeah, I was pretty excited.”

“And at first, it all seemed...dreamy. He invited me to one of the best seafood spots in NYC, the kind of place with a waitlist that could outlive your favorite pair of shoes. I was 20 minutes late (classic), and he even waited outside the entire time just so I wouldn’t have to sweat it out trying to find the place.”

“The moment I arrived, he was charming and warm, all smiles as he opened the door for me. He even helped me out of my coat like he was some gallant gentleman from a black-and-white movie. I thought, ’Wow, maybe I’ve finally found someone who’s different.’”

But just 15 minutes into the date, his demeanor shifted drastically.

“We sat down, and for the first 15 minutes, everything seemed perfect. We ordered, shared a few laughs, and I felt that hopeful buzz you get on a really promising date. The evening had all the right vibes. Then, to see if we were truly compatible, I casually asked what kind of partner he was looking for. And that’s when things took a turn.”

“His face shifted, like I’d flipped some hidden switch, and suddenly he was off. He went on and on about how ’ungrateful’ his ex was. He detailed date after date where he’d ’gone above and beyond’ for her, and how she’d dared to break up with him. It felt like something straight out of a cringe-worthy dating reality show. My hopeful heart began to sink like the Titanic, but I kept telling myself, ’Maybe he just needs to vent?’”

“By the time he started criticizing her Christmas gift ideas, though, I knew. This was not the magical, expensive first date I’d envisioned. The funny, charming guy I’d been chatting with had completely disappeared, replaced by someone who seemed ready to take the stand in court.”

The man insisted on paying for dinner, but just a few hours later, he sent her an angry text message.

“That’s when I knew it was our last date. I told him upfront that discussing exes is taboo for me. And suggested we split the bill, because the bill was a whopping $700, but he refused, insisting that the girl shouldn’t have to pay the bills.”

“A few hours later, I got angry texts from him saying he was ’done with women who couldn’t appreciate a real man.’ Oh, please. A real man doesn’t spend an entire dinner going on about his ex! I texted him back, politely (or as polite as I could be while borderline fuming) and told him, ’Look, I think we just have different expectations. Good luck!’”

“I thought that would be the end of it. But nope. Enter the paragraphs. He started calling me shallow and selfish, claiming I ’wasn’t open-minded enough to understand his truth.’ His truth? Sir, your truth was three hours of self-pity, served with a side of garlic bread.”

The next day, he texted her once more, baffled as to why she wasn’t interested in a second date.

“The next day, he texted again. Now he wanted an ’explanation’ for why I didn’t want a second date, and I thought okay. Let’s give him one. So, I wrote back, ’Honestly, I just think we’re looking for different things. Also, you spent most of the dinner blaming your ex. It’s just... not attractive.’ And I sent it. Done and done, right?”

“Wrong. A few minutes later, another notification. Now he was offended, outraged. He started listing his achievements, ’I make six figures, I own my own car, I’ve traveled.’ He ended with, ’Do you know how hard it is to find someone like me?’”

“I thought about replying with, ’Well, my friend, it looks like we both dodged a bullet,’ but instead, I just blocked him.”

Later, she learned about the man’s past relationship history, and it left her feeling guilty for having blocked him.

“So, of course, for the next two weeks, this became the story I couldn’t stop telling. My friends, coworkers, even random people at the coffee shop got the full rundown of ’Mr. Angry Ex Rant.’ It was just too ridiculous not to share. If you’re from New York, you know the dating scene is wild—everyone has a story that could either be a rom-com or a total horror show. Finally, I had my own wild tale to contribute.”

“Then I shared it with my yoga friend, expecting the usual laughs and ’Wow, he sounds terrible’ responses. But she just looked at me with raised eyebrows and said, ’Wait, I actually know this guy.’ My jaw practically hit the mat.”

“As it turned out, he really was the impressive guy I’d been so drawn to on the app. She explained that, in his past relationships, he’d been through a lot. His ex, she said, had drained him emotionally and financially, only to leave him for one of his own friends — a guy who just happened to be a high-powered finance exec. Apparently, she’d even cheated on him toward the end. So, yeah, ouch.”

“Hearing that hit me like a truck. Suddenly, his odd behavior on our date made a lot more sense, and the guilt set in fast for blocking him after the first date. Here I was, spinning him into a punchline for my friends, without any clue what he’d been through. Now, I’m at a total loss. Do I just let it go? Or should I unblock him, apologize, and maybe even suggest a second date?
I honestly don’t know what’s worse — sticking to my guns and feeling guilty, or reaching out and risking more monologues about the ex-girlfriend.”

We truly appreciate you sharing your story, and we hope our readers can offer some thoughtful advice. From our perspective, here’s what we’d like to share.

It’s completely understandable to feel guilty after learning about someone’s background, especially when that context helps explain behaviors that initially came across as red flags.

However, remember that everyone has their own baggage, and while his experiences may explain his venting, they don’t entirely excuse it. In healthy dating, we bring our best selves, or at least try to, instead of focusing on past wounds. His intense reaction on your date may indicate he still has unresolved pain that could affect any new relationship.

If you feel compelled to reach out, do so with kindness but without any expectations. You might acknowledge his past struggles, but also set the tone that moving forward, you’d need openness and a willingness to let go of past bitterness. If he’s still healing from his past, he may need space to do so.

At the end of the day, trust your instincts: you deserve someone who brings positivity and emotional availability, just like you do.

Recently, we received another heartbreaking story of betrayal. A husband left his wife and their newborn for three weeks, moving in with a colleague because he claimed the baby was “too loud.”