After Losing Her Husband at 22, She Decided to Have His Child — Only to Face a New Trial

At just 22, Isobel Barnes faced unimaginable heartbreak when her husband Luke, 34, was diagnosed with heart muscle disease in 2019. As his condition worsened, culminating in a spot on the heart transplant waiting list in March 2022, their shared dreams seemed to hang by a thread. Yet, Isobel remains steadfast in her determination to keep their vision of building a family alive, even in the face of profound loss.

By November 2022, Luke’s condition had worsened to the point where he had to remain in the hospital full-time while awaiting a heart transplant. In December of the same year, he underwent a procedure to implant a biventricular assist device (BiVAD) to aid his heart’s blood-pumping function.

Tragically, in March 2023, Luke peacefully passed away due to a catastrophic hemorrhage and multiple organ failure caused by excessive bleeding stemming from a BiVAD failure.

However, before Luke’s passing, the couple made a choice to save his sperm, so that Isobel could keep building their family just like they had always hoped. “We always knew he was facing death, so we could still continue our family. A lot of people are not that lucky,” Isobel opens up.

In the aftermath of Luke’s passing, Isobel embarked on a journey to pay tribute to her husband’s love for adventure. She traveled around Australia and Bali for two months, engaging in activities such as skydiving and taking a hot air balloon ride. On their first wedding anniversary, Isobel found solace on a Bali beach, gazing at the stars.

“It was very bittersweet. I stayed in the bubble hotel on our anniversary and looked at the stars. That was special,” the young woman recalls.

However, upon returning to her home in Nottingham, England, the reality of her loss began to set in, and Isobel admitted to struggling significantly, “I have to recreate my own life. Everything reminds me of him.”

Now Isobel is eager to initiate the in vitro fertilization (IVF) process within the next year, aiming to bring their common child into the world, “I can’t wait to bring a little Barnes into the world.” Even though the IVF process hasn’t yet commenced, Isobel’s family is already excited about the prospect of the impending arrival. “People are already talking about baby Barnes, even though he hasn’t arrived yet,” Isobel remarks.

Isobel is well aware that the idea of “conceiving a child after death” carries a sense of taboo, yet she is grateful for the opportunity to receive such a “precious gift.” She has already taken steps to prepare for her unborn child, including creating and purchasing a collection of clothes. “I’ve knitted a wardrobe full of kids’ clothes, and I have one with the word ’daddy’ on it,” Isobel reveals.

While Isobel is undeniably enthusiastic about becoming a mother, she acknowledges the emotional complexity of the situation without Luke by her side, “It’s heart-wrenching to see couples announcing pregnancies or leaving the hospital with their babies.”

She reflects on the possibility of the decision being selfish, but emphasizes that “baby Barnes will have a dad. He’s just not here anymore, but he’ll know about him.” Isobel continues, “Of course, the only thing I want to do for the rest of my life is make my husband proud.”

However, the young woman’s plans were once again disrupted by her illness. At 23, Isobel faced serious health issues and underwent surgery. She shared a selfie from the hospital, revealing that she had a 50% chance of losing her bowel and spending the rest of her life with a bag.

Isobel wrote, “So grateful to my ileostomy bag for not only saving my life, but giving me the best quality of life I’ve ever had. There’s so much negativity around living with a stoma, people focus on the bad and I was so worried before my surgery about leaks, clothes, my body and so much more.

Here’s to breaking the stigma, raising awareness and showing bodies that have been through trauma and come out the other side thriving. Next step is keep moving my body, getting stronger and healthier. Absolutely adore the community on here of people who inspire me every day!”

We wish Isobel a speedy recovery. Losing a spouse is always a great blow, but many find the strength and desire to live on. Patrick Swayze’s widow shared that her late husband blessed her new relationship.