“I Experienced Deep Humiliation,” Nicole Kidman Opens Up About the Trauma She Suffered After Filming Intimate Scenes

10 months ago

Nicole Kidman is renowned for her bold and captivating acting, but beneath the surface of fame and elegance, there’s a facet of her work that often remains unexplored: the emotional weight that intimate scenes can carry for an actor. In a recent interview, she courageously opened up about this aspect, discussing the challenge of maintaining a professional commitment while safeguarding personal comfort. Through her candid reflections, Kidman unveiled the profound extent of her devotion to the art of acting.

She felt deep humiliation.

Nicole Kidman recently opened up with unreserved honesty about her experience on the hit TV series Big Little Lies, in which she portrayed the complex character Celeste Wright, a woman ensnared in a challenging and emotionally taxing marriage. Kidman revealed that taking on this role brought about considerable trials, leaving her emotionally exposed, fragile, and profoundly humbled.

In her own words, she shared, “I felt very exposed and vulnerable and deeply humiliated at times.”

One specific scene had a significant impact on her mental well-being.

Of all the episodes, there’s one scene that stayed etched in Kidman’s mind. “I remember lying on the floor in the bathroom... and I just wouldn’t get up in-between takes,” she recollected.

“I was just lying there, sort of broken and crying, and I remember at one point Jean-Marc coming over and just sort of placing a towel over me because I was just lying there in half-torn underwear and just basically on the ground with nothing on, and I was just, like [gasps].”

She taps into the shared experiences of other women.

Considering the experiences of other women who have faced comparable challenges, Kidman shares, “But at times, I would have flashes of images of women that have gone through this, and I’m like, ’This is authentic, this is the truth, and this is what I have to do, and it would just come through like that.’ But it was beautifully written, I have to say, and Jean-Marc is an exquisite director because he was able to modulate it and allow it to be and to grow and see and then sort of paste it together, you know.”

It had a profound impact on her, yet it was crucial for the role.

The emotional weight of those scenes continued to linger even after the cameras stopped rolling. “I would keep on a very brave face at work, and then I would go home, and I didn’t realize how much it had penetrated me,” Kidman disclosed. “It affected me in a deep way.”

“When I would go home, I would feel ashamed, and that’s the same emotions and the same feelings that Celeste was having,” Kidman clarified. “So we were very much parallel in the feelings, but I was willing to do that for the role because that’s what I felt was important for the role.”

She separates the art from the artist.

Discussing her perspective on storytelling and character portrayal, Kidman explained, “When I talk about not censoring myself through my own inhibitions and not then affecting a story or a character because of my own inhibitions, I’m here to tell the story and to be true to the art, not to bring my own problems in terms of what I feel comfortable with, not comfortable with. I’ve got to go work that stuff out so that I can come as a pure vessel to the work, if that makes sense.”

Through her acting, she aids women in comprehending domestic violence.

In looking back, Kidman experiences a profound sense of gratitude for the lasting impact her role in the show has had on other women. She shared, “I’m glad that it’s created the conversation, I’m glad that it sort of pulled the veil off. I’ve received the most amazing e-mails from people saying I now understand why women stay [...], and if that changes one person’s life, that’s amazing for me.”

It’s not only scenes involving domestic violence that can be demanding for actors. On occasion, a role presents significant challenges for movie stars due to the costumes and makeup they must wear.


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