My Husband Went on a Solo Vacation and Upon His Return He Rallied His Entire Family Against Me

People
month ago

Our reader Stephanie shared a story that touched her to the core. Her husband’s relatives turned against her, and her husband not only didn’t stand up for her but also started shouting at her. We are publishing Stephanie’s story and the comments of people who sided with the woman.

Stephanie’s story

I’m Stephanie, I’m 37, and so is my husband. We have four children under the age of 6. I have a small home shop, but mostly, I take care of the kids while my husband works a full-time job. Recently, he received a bonus and went on a 10-day solo trip to Bali. Okay, that’s fine, but when he returned, everything just got worse.

When he came back, he promised me a break, but things took a turn. He pressured me into helping with the kids in front of his family, even yelling, “For once, can you get up and help me with the kids?

To give him credit, he initially agreed to take care of the kids for an afternoon on Saturday. However, his cousin invited us to a costume party on the same day, and since his girlfriend is one of my best friends, I thought it would be a great opportunity for me to relax. My husband assured me he would handle the kids and even watch them while I took a breather.

The day has come

On the day of the party, the kids were quite a handful — crying, screaming, and engaging in constant battles while ignoring any attempts at discipline. Since it was my day off, I chose to relax by the pool, basking in the sun and enjoying the music. Even though he repeatedly sought my assistance, I reminded him that he had agreed to take care of the children, emphasizing that this was my well-deserved downtime.

After enduring an hour of chaotic scenes, he finally reached his breaking point and loudly demanded that I get up and help with the kids. His outburst drew the attention of everyone around, and I even overheard my mother-in-law mutter, “What a terrible mother.”

Navigating parenthood challenges

I got upset. I reminded him that I had the kids alone for 10 days while he was in Bali. He argued back, voices getting loud. Some overheard and started calling me a lazy mom, implying I take advantage of him.

In the midst of overwhelming emotions, I reached my breaking point and tears welled up as I expressed my frustration. I told them that I needed a moment, got into the car, and drove away. Several hours later, I returned to pick up my partner and the children. The atmosphere in the car on the way home was heavy with silence.

Later that evening, my partner attempted to explain that the kids were having a tough day, and he simply needed my support for a while. I countered, feeling the situation wasn’t equitable, especially considering I had shouldered the responsibility of caring for the kids alone for two weeks. What stung even more was the fact that he hadn’t immediately defended me when people insulted me.
Was it my responsibility? Should I have assisted him with the children?

What our readers think about Stephanie’s story.

  • I’m appalled that he would take a 10 day trip to Bali alone leaving you with 4 young children. Then he can’t handle the kids for an hour? Then he doesn’t defend you to his family. There’s no way I’d ever tolerate what you’ve tolerated. I’d be serving him with divorce papers. Short of that, please do not have more children with this man child. © Kathy Poznick Gorski / Facebook
  • He took a trip to Bali by himself? Dear lord lady, divorce this man. Either he took someone else with him to Bali or he met up with someone there because no responsible husband would leave you at home for 10 days with your kids. © Trish Brennon / Facebook
  • Why do a married man need to take a holiday on his own,sorry there would be no way he goes on his own. You are a married man if you go we all go. © Carole Evens / Facebook
  • He’d be getting the divorce papers ASAP and his mother would be told that since she considers her son to be so amazing she can have him back, see how lazy he is when she’s running around after him. © Yvonne Fisher / Facebook
  • If your partner does not stand up for you or stand by you when his family are putting you down; they are not worth staying with. © Merri Hunt / Facebook
  • There’s no freaking way my husband is going on a 10-day solo trip to Bali and I’m not leaving for my 10-day solo trip to wherever the very next day after his return. This man couldn’t even handle his own children for a single afternoon, not even a full day! Ridiculous! © Anna Miniss / Facebook
  • I hope you took the same amount of money put it on the side, you’ll be divorcing him soon enough. Better to be prepared. © Fred Hansen / Facebook
  • 10 day solo trip to Bali? Probably not your first clue that something is majorly off in your relationship and I would bet probably not a solo trip. You don’t get breaks as a parent. It’s 24/7/365. If the children truly were getting out of hand you should have stepped in, but your “husband” should not have allowed anyone to disparage you. Actually grandma could have helped entertain the kids a little herself! I would say it’s time to put on your big girl pants and have some deep conversations with your spouse. Get some couples counseling and decide if your situation is worth saving. Taking extended trips to exotic locations without your spouse is selfish. Why didn’t he invite you? © Kimberly Flannery Hennen / Facebook

Rebuilding a relationship with a partner is sometimes not easy, as there can be thousands of reasons why people argue. For example, this woman shared that she wants to divorce her husband because of his sister’s children.

Comments

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He is setting you up as `at fault` for when he walks away from the marriage so that he still has the support of his family and friends. Going away to Bali on his own for 10 days when he has 4 children under 6yrs is totally unacceptable - that is if he even went on is own. He only cares about himself - Selfish.

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