6 Ways to Build Friendly Relations with Your Mother-in-Law

month ago

Relationships within a family are not always smooth, especially when it comes to a partner’s relatives. Some are lucky to have understanding mothers-in-law, while others not so much. However, even in the most challenging situations, it’s possible to improve the relationship with your husband’s mother, creating a peaceful and comfortable atmosphere for everyone in the family.

Include your partner in everything relating to the house and child.

It is true that men don’t always spend time on household matters and are not prepared very well when a child arrives. In many of these cases, they will probably receive suggestions from their mothers and transfer them to their wives. However, what their mother says might be completely different from what their wife has in mind.

In order to avoid a clash of ideas, it’s best if both partners know exactly what they are doing regarding the house and their kid. This way it’s easier to set joint boundaries for their in-laws without creating any misunderstandings and hard feelings.

Make a weekly visit or call schedule.

If your mother-in-law wants to visit your home every day or at random times, you should have a conversation with your partner. You should both agree on a schedule and let your in-laws know about it. It could be a visit with the child to their home every Sunday or a couple of video calls during the week. Whatever you decide, you should tell them nicely and expect them to follow it.

Communicate your feelings early on.

When a child comes, it’s only natural that your mother-in-law will want to visit your home more often. However, this might not be ideal for you and you will have to talk to her about your feelings. It might be best if your partner starts the conversation and you explain to her why she can’t visit every single day or whenever she pleases. You can also let her know that your behavior can be a bit aggressive when you are tired, so she shouldn’t judge you for it.

Don’t start a competition with her.

Mothers think they know and love their children more than anyone in the world. That’s why they often antagonize their son’s wife in many different areas of their lives. However, you should be careful not to fall into that trap and start a competition with your mother-in-law. Instead, you should address the issue when it makes its presence and let her know in a calm manner that you are not trying to keep her away from her son.

It would be even better if you encourage your husband to start spending more quality time with his parents alone. That will make his mother feel more secure that their relationship isn’t fading away.

Don’t be afraid to say “no”.

If a schedule hasn’t been set, it’s possible that your mother-in-law calls you whenever she wants, asking you if she can come over. And in an effort to please her and not make a bad impression, you say “yes” even though it’s the last thing you want to do. However, you should know that it’s okay to say “no” to her, explain the reason, and maybe provide her with a different day and time for a visit. It’s understandable that she has a need to see her grandchild, but you also need to be alone and enjoy your peace.

Avoid conflicts and let her be a grandmother.

Grandparents often indulge their grandchildren, while parents are responsible for discipline. Instead of blaming your mother-in-law for simple gestures like offering candy or frequent gift-giving, find a balance and maintain open communication about your parenting preferences. It’s essential to adapt and accommodate various family traditions and situations.

We hope these tips will help you build strong and trusting relationships with your mother-in-law. You won’t face difficulties like this family, where the mother-in-law demanded money for babysitting her grandchild.


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