I Was Devastated When My Best Friend Asked Me to Be a Bridesmaid on Her Wedding Day and What She Did After

People
3 weeks ago

Friendship can last a long time, but it can have tough times. Today’s story is about a 34-year-old woman who’s upset because her best friend of over 20 years acted badly on her special day. She wrote us a letter, and we could tell she was on the verge of tears as she shared her story.

These two women were really good friends, and their friendship seemed strong.

Alyson, 34, recently shared a heartbreaking story with our editorial about her relationship with her childhood best friend, Miranda, 35. She began by expressing her excitement to support Miranda on her wedding day but soon faced challenges: «My childhood best friend got married last weekend. I was so excited and delighted to be there to support her on her big day. Trashy things in our relationship started happening immediately.»

Miranda asked Alyson to be a bridesmaid but imposed strict requirements: «Right after Miranda asked me to be her bridesmaid, she said that she would make me dress in a ’girly’ way. She made a list of requirements, that included a dress, heels, growing my hair to at least bob length. And I was supposed to dye my hair and get a tan. And what was the worst for me, that I definitely had to use body make up to cover my tattoos.» As a lifelong tomboy, Alyson felt uncomfortable with these demands but agreed to everything except growing her hair.

Despite her efforts to compromise, Miranda removed Alyson from the bridesmaid lineup. Alyson, feeling hurt, agreed to still attend the wedding but was deeply affected by the situation.

As the situation progressed, Alyson’s frustration grew.

Alyson continued her story, recounting how Miranda asked her to make wedding favors and manage the dessert table, despite their strained relationship: «I’m a chocolatier, so Miranda asked me if I could make the wedding favors and take full care of a dessert table. Though our relationship had been pretty much spoiled by her requirements to my appearance and the fact that she had reconsidered me being her bridesmaid, I was ecstatic to help her with everything. I went above and beyond to create an absolutely amazing table that was a tremendous hit of the day.»

However, Miranda’s behavior towards Alyson didn’t improve, but even went worse: «She then told me that the wedding was approaching to the point where it would become over-budget and Miranda wanted to keep costs low. So, she said that my husband was not invited. I was fuming, but she was my best friend, and we’ve been through many things together. I thought it all was the result of her pre-wedding stress, so I was extremely understanding and even reduced my rates for the table I arranged as my personal present to the couple.»

The unfriendly behavior from Alyson’s best friend didn’t end there.

Alyson wrote, «A month later, after reviewing the guest list, Miranda told me that my husband could still come with me, but if he did, I would be moved away from the head table.» Alyson shared that her husband is actually a wedding photographer, and he was eager to build his videography portfolio. They knew that Miranda and her husband-to-be didn’t have a videographer.

Alyson’s husband then offered them to film a professional wedding video for them, and he was going to do that free of charge. The woman shared, «Miranda was ecstatic, and she suggested she would move us to the vendor table so that we could cooperate with the other vendors. We really liked the idea, and it was agreed that we would be sitting with the vendors.»

Then, things took a totally unhealthy turn. Alyson wrote, «The day of the wedding, my husband and I arrived 4 hours early to help with the event. He spent the time filming while I was arranging the dessert table. After the ceremony, guests were moved to the party room and the original room was converted into the place for the reception. While helping with converting the room, I was thunderstruck to discover that my best friend actually didn’t add our names on the seating list.»

There appeared to be no vendor table and Alyson with her husband had to sit in a separate room as they were not on the list. That separate room was closed off from the reception, they couldn’t hear or see anything, and couldn’t even talk to anybody.

Alyson is deeply wounded by the entire situation.

Alyson said, «After we were suggested to sit in a separate room, I approached Miranda to explain the situation. She said that it was some mix-up. I understand it all, but Miranda didn’t do anything to get us moved to the main room. We were just cut off from the reception. I missed the whole wedding and spent the majority of the evening sobbing in the bathroom. My husband continued to film everything, he wanted to get a beautiful video for them.»

Alyson closed her letter saying, «After the whole situation, I texted Miranda and told her about my feelings. She started to apologize and explained she was scatterbrained during that day. She said she felt extremely guilty and wanted still to remain friends. And the only wish I have now is to never ever see her in my life again.»

Our advice.

We’re thankful to Alyson for bravely sharing her story with us, and we believe many people can relate to her feelings.

Our advice to Alyson is simple: she doesn’t need to take any further action. She has already shown immense kindness and loyalty to her friend. Despite Miranda’s hurtful behavior, Alyson has nothing to apologize for. It’s entirely within Alyson’s right to consider cutting ties with Miranda after this incident.

Even if Alyson chooses to maintain communication with Miranda, we recommend setting clear boundaries and being cautious about fully trusting her as a friend again.

Some friendships last for decades, and it’s amazing to see them endure over time. Just like celebrities as Eva Longoria and Victoria Beckham, who have been friends for years, their bond is exciting to witness.

Preview photo credit freepik / Freepik

Comments

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Oh dear, Miranda showed exactly what she was doing. she used you to the breaking point without any doubt.
That she didn't know what she was doing because she had "so much on her mind" is an afterthought.
I would personally take and write online that people can tell the house of the party and how they thought the confectionery etc. was because you, who had arranged everything, were not allowed inside with the guests even though you were one of her friends. Ask people to tell etc. and if someone asks you tell them everything you had done and that Miranda thought you and your husband could be among the vendors, that she simply ignored you and your husband as the friend you thought you were. That she was just taking advantage of your craft and your husband as a photographer. I hope you were paid for what you and your husband did, if she counts you as staff then you should have been paid as staff ie with money for everything the material cost.

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